You Become What You Spend Time On.

What is worth your time and what is not.

Many watches, some open on the floor.
Photo by Heather Zabriskie on Unsplash

It’s too obvious you say. We all know it. But do we really understand it? Spending your time on something is spending your life on it. You only have one here on earth.

The more you do something the more you become it. The first time you start running, you are not called a runner. If you run every second day and keep it up for a few months, people will call you a runner. Later you will receive other tags like “fit”, “in shape”, “healthy”, “full of life” and so on. It all starts with what you spend your time on.

So what are we spending our time on?

This is not worth your time.

Hating someone

The time and energy spent on hating steals your very precious time. Why spend it hating?

You hate or dislike a politician? Just look at the way he/she draws you in and steals your time. To hate someone you have to spend time to know something about them. Why waste your time.

Hating someone is a waste of energy and time.

“To hate everything is to be wounded by everything.”– Marty Rubin

Being bitter

anger and disappointment at being treated unfairly; resentment.

But are we not taught that life is unfair? Well if we did not learn it somewhere we get to experience it somewhere along the way.

Being resentful and bitter is like drinking poison every day and thinking that another person will die. Newsflash! they don’t even know about your bitterness most of the time.

We spent so much time thinking about why we were treated unfairly. Many times we fight it inward and outward. Sometimes we win, but most of the time we cannot change the way we were treated.

What if, maybe, why me. It is a time grabber an attention thief. Unfortunately, we find some sort of pleasure in it. But still, it is wasting your time.

I can hold on to that, that bitterness and that anger. It won’t get me anywhere. — Brian Banks

Waiting for the right time to do something.

There always is better timing to do something but the right time to do something is rare.

“I used to think timing was everything. I have since learned that now is the time for everything.”
― 
Stella Mowen

Life is about timing but many of us think that everything must first be in perfect order before we do something. The wait will be too long.

Procrastination is very dangerous. It will keep you in limbo for much too long. You convince yourself that you are waiting for the right time, but in fact, you are just stalling. Because we do not know precisely what is going on in the world and because we do not know the future we struggle to find the right timing.

In hindsight, it may have been the right time to do something, but at the moment it’s not always clear. Inside the moment you do not always have all the information. Trust your heart if it is impossible to get all the information.

We plan, predict, strategize, envision, and try and get all the information. In most cases, only time will tell if our timing was right.

Timing is irrelevant when it comes to desire. – Marjorie Liu

Political speeches and debates.

We must stay informed. We must be up to date. We must find out what’s new. We tell ourselves this all the time. Unfortunately, we do not always find that in political debates or speeches. Many promises yes.

Finding a true political savior is difficult. In any case, you will see it in his or her actions. The words may be many and wasting your time will be sure, but actions will speak the loudest.

Spend your time in your world and not in the world of politicians, it’s the only one you can control.

“ Political language is designed to make Lies sound truthful and Murder respectable” — George Orwell

Being consumed by fear.

You get good fear and bad fear.

Fear keeps you aware of what is happening and what could happen. Fear has helped humanity survive.

The good one keeps you off the railroad tracks. The bad one keeps you from publishing an article online.

Do one thing every day that scares you.”
― 
Eleanor Roosevelt

The good one usually does not consume you, the bad fear is in most cases a consuming fear. Safe to say a fear of thee unknown?

Anxiety is present in both fears but with bad fear, it consumes you with unrealistic, probably impossible outcomes.

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.”
― 
Paulo Coelho

Scientifically fear is a chain reaction in the brain that starts with a stressful stimulus and ends with the release of chemicals that cause a racing heart, fast breathing, and energized muscles, among other things, also known as the fight-or-flight response.

Every time we flee from fear it eats us up bit by bit. It consumes you. You do not become stronger when you run from fear.

I’m talking about the bad fear. Do not run away from your appointment with the doctor, the speech you have to make, the CV you have to hand in, the pay increase you have to ask for.

Run from a spider, snake, or tiger. That make’s sence.

“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.”
— Dale Carnegie

False Evidence Appearing Real — F.E.A.R

Being offended.

Nobody’s perfect. We all make mistakes. Sometimes you offend someone and don’t even know it. Is it possible that you have done the same?

So many times people get offended without the “offender” even knowing it.

Seeking approval and people pleasing forces you to alter your actions and speech to no longer reflect what you actually think or feel. — Mark Manson

Feeling offended is an emotional state which influences your whole life. You look at things differently. You interpret things wrong. It messes you up. And so what if you are right?

Can you change the other person’s actions? Even if you could would it mean anything?

Move on and stop wasting your time on what other people do or have done. You can only control your own actions and reactions.

What is worth your time?

Making memories

The older I get the more I “get” this thing.

Taking photos helps with bringing back those memories.

“What i like about photographs is that they capture a moment that’s gone forever, impossible to reproduce.”
― Karl Lagerfeld

All we really have is NOW! Make it count, make memories out of them.

“The past beats inside me like a second heart.”
― John Banville

Being grateful

Do you have a phone, car, running hot water in your house, internet, fridge, electricity, access to clean drinking water? Welcome to the rich club!

Being grateful can be as simple as enjoying the air you are breathing now. It means you are alive!

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.” — William Arthur Ward

Loving someone or something

We all know it’s a risk.

Sometimes you can decide that you want to love but other days it just arrest’s you. Either way it is worth it.

4Love endures with patience and serenity, love is kind and thoughtful, and is not jealous or envious; love does not brag and is not proud or arrogant. 5It is not rude; it is not self-seeking, it is not provoked [nor overly sensitive and easily angered]; it does not take into account a wrong endured. 6It does not rejoice at injustice, but rejoices with the truth [when right and truth prevail]. 7Love bears all things [regardless of what comes], believes all things [looking for the best in each one], hopes all things [remaining steadfast during difficult times], endures all things [without weakening]. — AMP

Being in the moment

Modern living is geared to take us to other “moments”, other fears and other peoples experience. Why are we so moved by events on the other side of the world which we cannot control? Or about something that might, possibly, maybe happen. And what if it does?

Do every act of your life as though it were the very last act of your life.”
― 
Marcus Aurelius

Did all the worrying help? It only robbed you of the present moment.

Mindfulness can help with this. The Oxford dictionary explains it like this.

a mental state achieved by focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.

Laughing

Medical studies have proven the following about laughter.

Reduces blood pressure.

Can reduce anxiety and other negative emotions.

It’s an immune booster.

May act as a natural anti-depressant.

You breathe better after laughing.

It’s good for your cardiovascular system.

It calms stress hormones.

And yes, it burns calories.

Help someone.

It will make you feel better, keep you in the moment and it could mean the world to someone else.

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